No drips allowed

So the other day I was at work, merrily minding my own business, and I was forced to go into the outside world in search of window cleaner. (Literally, actually, my boss thrust money into my hand and propelled me out the door.)

Now maybe I’m just poor. But we used vinegar to clean our windows when I was a kid, and that’s what I use at home. Nice, smooth shine. And it’s so much fun to crinkle up old newspapers and rub them all over the windows. The scent also disippates quite rapidly, especially if you have the other windows open while you were. I mean, I’m also a stupid hippie so I try to use home-made cleaners whenever possible, and I try to make sure that those cleaners minimize environmental impact. In addition, I’m a cheapskate and I dislike the idea of paying $4 for a product designed for only one use, unlike vinegar which is an all purpose utility sort of thing. And costs $4 for a GIANT JUG. But, no, I was expected to buy commercial glass cleaner.

I was surprised to learn when I got to the store that there’s a wide array of glass cleaning products available. It seems like the most represented brand is “Windex,” and that was the type I was asked to get, but there’s more than one type of Windex, apparently, including “Windex No Drip.” Windex is a shocking shade of blue, also. (I don’t understand how rubbing glass with brightly coloured liquids is supposed to get it any cleaner.)

I was a little confused by the labeling. Did they mean that drips shouldn’t use Windex? Or that this Windex was guaranteed effective against drips? (I sort of enjoy the thought of rampaging through the streets spraying people with Windex, watching the drips melt away.) So I had to read the bottle. It turns out that the product is designed…not to drip. Because this is apparently a big problem in the glass cleaning world. Such a big problem that a product was specifically designed to combat dripping.

I’m glad, you know, that scientists are concerned with such pressing issues as dripping glass cleaners. I’m sure someone, somewhere, is very happy about “Windex No Drip,” simply because they haven’t discovered the joys of a cleaning solution like vinegar. But I have to wonder…if S C Johnson had invested the amount of funding in, say, AIDS as they do in products like “Windex No Drip,” what sort of world we would be living in. (Perhaps one with products like “AIDS No Drip”: now with extra-immune boosting shine!)

[Windex No Drip]