After reading The Emperors of Chocolate, I felt like I had to read Charlie, just to balance things out. And because there were several references to this famous Roald Dahl book which whetted my appetite for one of my most favourite books ever.

I’m going to assume that you have read Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, so I don’t need to tell you what happens, nor am I spoiling anything by discussing the plot.

One thing which I really thought about in this reading was all of the lessons embedded in the book. There are definitely some morals about greed and a lust for objects as we see the greedy, consumerist characters contrasted with Charlie. There are also a few oh-so-pleasant anti-fat digs in the book, which I try to overlook in the interest of the fact that the book is otherwise excellent. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory suggests that awesome things can happen to anyone, at any time, and I like that. It also promotes reading over television, charity over selfishness, and other values I am pretty fond of.

I also rethought the Oompa Loompas this time. After all, they are basically illegal immigrants (Wonka talks about shipping them in boxes with airholes drilled in), and they are held prisoner in the factory to work as eternal factory laborers. That’s kind of depressing. I mean, the book portrays them as happy little colored people (which is problematic in and of itself), who volunteer to work at the factory, and are stoked to be there, but I have to wonder. There’s a whiff of white man’s burden that I hadn’t really paid attention to before.

That said, I still really like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and I’m not going to let PC sensibilities ruin a good book for me. But I can see how people get riled up so easily about books; I’m sure it’s pretty easy to find something objectionable in almost any book. This is one of the reasons I’m not a fan of book banning or the destruction of other works of art on the basis of their aesthetics, because it strikes me as a very slippery slope.

Demographics:

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, by Roald Dahl. Published 1964, 155 pages. Fiction.

Chocolate is pretty neat stuff, and the American candy industry is quite interesting, even to those who don’t consume candy. I actually read this book a few years ago, but given the dearth of books that don’t suck at the library, I decided to read it again rather than attempting, yet again, to slog through another pile of crap. Have I mentioned lately that I’m been extremely irritable? Because I have been, and I blame that at least in part on the horrid selection at the library, and the suddenly glacially slow ILL. I’ve had three books “in transit” for weeks, and it’s starting to really irk me.

Basically, this is a book about the rivalry between Mars and Hershey, but it’s also about major shifts in the American candy industry, which was once dominated by small, regional producers who were largely unknown beyond their small areas. The bulk of the nation’s candy today is produced by Mars and Hershey, with small producers rapidly on the decline (for more on that, read Candyfreak), and candy in this country is increasingly generic, thanks to distribution systems which can put a Milky Way on every shelf. The Emperors of Chocolate chronicles the birth of the American candy industry, tracks the two major companies, and talks about their evolution over time.

For example, did you know that Hershey basically didn’t advertise until the 1970s? And that Mars is one of the most infamously reclusive companies in the world? That the largest shareholder in Hershey is an orphanage, the Milton Hershey School? One can’t help but be mesmerized, I tell you.

I really enjoyed reading about the way new products are developed, how various candies are manufactured, and how Hershey and Mars have vied for supremacy over the American candy market. I was also glad to have my theory about Hershey chocolate vindicated: it’s not just me that thinks Hershey is crap! It’s most of the world! Hooray!

The Emperors of Chocolate is a neat glimpse into the shadowy underworld of candy, and it’s well worth reading, in my opinion. There are all sorts of neat little factoids and awesome illustrations to supplement the next. I can see why the author was inspired to write the book after doing a brief article on Mars and realizing that there was just too much fascinating content for one article alone.

Demographics:

The Emperors of Chocolate, by Joel Glenn Brenner. Published 1999, 366 pages. Gastronomy.

Ok, I just have to rant for a moment.

This “gas tax holiday” thing? It’s stupid. Really, really, really stupid. I can’t actually believe that it’s seriously being considered, and that Clinton is pushing it so hard. She must be really desperate for that good old working class vote, man, to be willing to screw the entire country over so royally for a paltry 18 cents a gallon.

For those of you who have been living under a rock, the Republicans came up with this great idea to repeal the federal excise tax on gasoline, which adds 18.4 cents to the price of each gallon of gasoline. This is supposed to help Americans cope with rising gas prices, apparently, and of course it’s meant to win over public sentiment. After all, you can’t bite the hand that votes for a repeal of the federal gas tax, right? And then Clinton jumped on the bandwagon, digging in a few snide comments at Obama along the way.

So here’s why it’s dumb.

For one thing, American gas prices are already kept artificially low, and I think they need to be allowed to self correct. When they did, it would potentially suck for awhile, especially for people who are commuting long distances, but ultimately it would be better for everyone. It would promote the development of more efficient cars, along with alternative fuels and technologies. Who knows, owning a small car might even turn trendy, and that would be a nice way to offset the image of American excess which is high in the minds of many people overseas. You want to drive a car, I think you should pay the price for it.

For another thing, we would have to make up that shortfall somewhere, probably by borrowing more money from China, which might not be the smartest call. China already holds a lot of American debt, and at some point they are going to want to call that in; probably not at a convenient point, either. I don’t think that cutting federal revenue is a good idea right now, what with the war and all. Restructuring the federal government to use money more effectively might be nice, though.

Repealing the gas tax temporarily would also be a bureaucratic nightmare, and I doubt much of a change would be seen at the pump. Instead, gas prices would just keep rising, and when the tax was reinstated, everyone would promptly flip out. The amount of system restructuring of pumps, computers, and so forth involved in a temporary tax repeal boggles the mind, and it seems like a huge waste to me, just like the amount of effort involved in sending out the stupid tax rebate checks. Has the government lost its mind? Since when has the creation of more pointless work been a good idea?

Without revenue from that tax, American highway infrastructure is also going to suffer, because that’s what the tax pays for. Roads require a lot of upkeep; do we really want to be throwing away a primo source of highway funding? Personally, I think not. Poor roads are already a rampant problem in some parts of the country, and I can’t imagine that they are magically going to get better.

Finally, this gas tax thing really pisses me off because it’s so clearly a bribe aimed at shortsighted idiots who will remember the name linked with their 18 cents a gallon savings when they vote, and that sickens me to the point of oozing bile. I realize that Americans are stupid and easily bought, but could politicians be a little less obvious about it?

Fair housing enforcers often target newspaper advertising, because it’s easy to spot bias. Seven Days Vermont supports fair housing, but thinks the fines for violations are unfair. Do you?

San Francisco’s stupid law about visible garbage cans is getting a second look, thanks to the outpouring of fury which resulted from people who got fined. Aside from the fact that the law is just dumb, it’s also pretty discriminatory: if you don’t have a space to conceal garbage cans, you’re expected to build one, whether or not you can afford it or fit it.

Being in a wheelchair doesn’t have to be boring. One quad has decided to turn it into an extreme sport.

Berkeley, land of happy hippie inclusion, is actually rife with socioeconomic disparity and class wars.

Celebrity chefs saving kids in bad neighborhoods with food is supposed to be heartwarming, right? Well, read this essay about the perils and tribulations of being a do-gooder, and think again.

Peat is making a comeback, thanks to high fuel prices. But is peat an environmentally sound alternative fuel?