this ain't livin'

Work | 26Oct07

I had a strange interaction in the grocery store yesterday, but that’s not what I’m going to write about today. It was just…extraordinarily awkward, and I’ve been pondering it all morning.

But the early stage of our conversation, before things got confessional and weird, was about my choice of profession. For those of my readers who don’t know what I do, I’m a freelance writer. An intellectual whore, as it were, shopping my brain out to the highest bidder. This profession really works for me. I love writing, I love being my own boss, and I love being able to assemble my own schedule. I work four days a week right now and I make way more than I ever did slaving at 40 hour jobs. It’s awesome.

Especially since I’m completely socially dysfunctional, and I am basically doomed to fail in every workplace because I hate people and I can’t hide it. You know Dr. Brennan from Bones? Yeah, I’m Dr. Brennan. Only less hot.

A lot of people seem to have trouble comprehending what I do, though. My responses seem to fall into a number of basic categories, and some responses really amaze me, because I am constantly surprised by how offensive people can be. And coming from someone with a formidable reputation for being incredibly thoughtless and rude, that’s saying something. But the things that come out of some people’s mouths…it’s really just mind boggling.

The first is the category of people who go on about how they could never do what I do because they aren’t self motivated and driven enough. Which is usually ok, except when they express surprise because they think I’m not self motivated. I’m not sure why people are under this impression; perhaps because I’m lazy about things I don’t care about, and I don’t care about things which society thinks I should care about. I also don’t understand what brings people to people comment about this; maybe they’re looking for some sort of affirmation from me, like “sure, you can do it.”

Instead, I usually say “yeah, well, paying rent is a pretty powerful motivator.”

Other people just don’t understand what I do. They can’t wrap their heads around the idea of writing and being paid for it. Or they think I’m somehow magically making money from this site, which always amuses me. And then they want me to do something for them for free, like editing a paper or something.

And then I have to explain that this is my job, and that while I do some pro bono work because I think it’s important to contribute to society, I can’t just endlessly do things for free. I have two longstanding relationships with people whom I do free work for; one of them trades other services, like helping me not look like a complete slob, and the other one is a very old friend. In both senses, I don’t really consider my work “free,” although they may not pay me in cash. The other free work I do is work which helps people improve themselves, like looking over resumes or college applications, or writing a text article to accompany a photograph series to submit for publication (which I suppose promotes me too, in a way).

Other people just want to know how much money I make, and while I know that’s out of curiosity to see if they can make it as freelancers, it makes me uncomfortable. Honestly, I am ashamed of how much money I make, and I am really struggling with class issues right now, and it’s not something that I really want to discuss with people, especially strangers I’m introduced to at parties I don’t want to attend. And also because everyone is different; not everyone can make it, and that’s kind of something you need to figure out on your own. And if I tell someone how much money I make, that might lead them to believe that they can make it when they can’t, or it might tell them to give up their dream of writing because it’s not enough, and I don’t really like playing such a major role in people’s life decisions.

And, my personal all time favorite:

“Gosh, I couldn’t work at home like that! I’d just eat all the time. Hee hee.”

This coming from a rail thin, obviously food obsessed woman who was eying my curves so hungrily that I was afraid she was going to start turning me into charcuterie if I turned my back on her for a second. Because, yes, folks, secretly my biggest concern about working from home is that I just eat all the time. It’s true. Right now I’m surrounded by platters of food. I had to install a vomitorium to cope with it all.

Because it’s not like I actually, you know, work when I say I’m working from home. Nope. Secretly I just cook all the time and money just falls out of the sky, which is really inconvenient when it ruins my roux.

Eidetic Toasters | 26Oct07

Stolen heart, literally. A Daly City mother is riled up because the coroner kept her son’s heart after the autopsy. FYI, that practice is actually quite common, so if you’re bothered about the thought of being buried without bits, you should probably avoid situations which might require an autopsy.

Africa holds many mysteries.

The Amateur Gourmet writes about his ethical position as a blogger reviewing restaurants; and ultimately concludes that he holds enough clout for off the cuff reviews to potentially be very harmful. This is a topic I’ve been musing on this week, so I was intrigued to see his post.

Amuse yourself with the Doctor Phil quiz. I was pretty impressed with the dead-on results, myself.

Conservation, consersmation, say the Feds. Who needs wildlife when you’ve got illegals to battle?

$400 billion is the predicted price tag for the sub prime mortgage debacle. Maybe if all those companies hadn’t been so greedy in the first place…

Changes are afoot for raw milk drinkers in California. If you care about raw milk, move fast.

Lise Mendel is a science blogger participating in NaBloPoMo.

Getting the Shaft | 25Oct07

I’ve been noticing a lot of reporting on the fires in Northern California, talking about all sorts of things. Some of the reports compare the situation with Hurricane Katrina, for example, or talk about measures being taken for the comfort of evacuees. I note that the finger pointing has already started, with officials being accused of not being prepared, or not being ready. How, exactly, does one prepare for epic wildfires driven by notorious Santa Ana winds?

One thing I don’t see is a discussion of what happens to the renters.

You know, people who own their homes have insurance. To varying degrees, to be certain, but their homes will eventually be rebuilt, and they will be given funds to help replace their belongs. Do these funds replace heirloom furniture, photographs, and other artefacts of human life? No, of course not, but at least people will have a place, a base, to rebuild their lives from. A starting point will be established.

Renters don’t have that. Renters, as my friend T puts it, are screwed. Almost no one has renter’s insurance because it seems ludicrous and it can get expensive. Those that do may not have fire protection in their coverage, because that area is known for having bad fires. Renters didn’t own homes, don’t have sites to rebuild homes, and now they have nothing. Many of them lost their jobs, and they are being forced to create their lives again from scratch. No furniture, no clothing, no kitchen utensils. No books. No beds. No towels to call their own. Imagine not owning a towel.

I have always been afraid of fire. There aren’t many things I’m afraid of, but fire is one of them. The thought of having everything taken away from me, of being suddenly homeless without the means to make a livelihood, to get dressed in the morning, to function. I would imagine it’s a common human fear, because it’s so visceral and basic.

I hope that some sort of plan is being made to help people in this position. Assistance payments that aren’t bound up in red tape, for example. Some of these people don’t even know if they are in this position or not yet—my butcher was telling me yesterday that her cousin might have lost her house, but they don’t know yet. Lost, like it wandered off in the mall and no one can find it. Her cousin is eight months pregnant. Imagine being eight months pregnant with a home, a secure job, and a life, and having all of that suddenly pulled out from under you. Having to stay with friends, to give birth in a strange hospital with a strange doctor. Knowing that you don’t have any baby clothes, that the changing table you just bought has been immolated.

There’s probably going to be a lot of coverage in the next few months on the events down south, but I have a feeling that it will continue to neglect the renters, because no one really wants to face what’s happening to them. As one renter to another, I know the feeling of powerlessness and misery, and I wish there was something more I could do.

Anxious Hake | 25Oct07

Imported food in Britain will only get to bear an organic label if it is also fair trade certified. Could this be the first step in refining the “organic” label to give it back its teeth?

Is being vegan better for the planet? It’s a claim made by a lot of vegofascists, and the answer is actually pretty complex.

10 tips for handling interactions with the police, including a handy printable cue card, in case you forget.

Obamania has apparently struck Obama himself. Look, dude. Just stop. Stop. Ok? Try again in 2012. Don’t make this any worse for yourself.

The Crime Library is pretty sweet. I’ve been spending a lot of time there lately. Please don’t ask why, because then I would have to kill you.

Chat Noir is a weird but neat little flash game. You will probably get it much more quickly than I did, because I don’t get games, but it was still fun.

BipolarLawyerCook is a…er…bipolar lawyer cook? Anyway, she’s participating in NaBloPoMo with me and she’s a barrel of fun times.

The Truth About California | 24Oct07

Given that California is in the news lately because of the fires in Southern California, I think it’s time for a quick lesson on one of the fundamentals of California culture for my non-Californian readers. You see, the interesting thing about California is that because it’s such a large state, it’s incredibly diverse. And, for some reason, people have all these misconceptions about California which are usually rapidly dashed when they arrive here.

I’m also opening the floor to you here, gentle readers. Is there some aspect of California culture that you’ve been dying to learn about? Some slang term I use that completely puzzles you? Some rumor you’ve been longing to have confirmed? You want to know what the state song is? Hit me in the comments. You know there’s a California mystique, and here’s your chance to dip your toes in it.

The most important thing to know about California is the fact that California is actually two states.

Now, before you run to your atlases, I should admit that this distinction is cultural, not geographical. But California is definitely composed of two states. There’s Northern California, and there’s Southern California. Also known as NorCal and SoCal. There’s also Central California, but we don’t talk about them.

Southern California has the palm trees, movie stars, sunny weather, and disgustingly huge mansions. They also steal Northern California’s water and give us a generally bad reputation, because idiots from other states think that all of California is like Southern California, thanks to Hollywood. I mean, I suppose we should be thanking Hollywood because all the idiots move to Southern California to pursue the California Dream instead of bothering us up here. But my point is that Los Angeles and points surrounding are not California. Even the Angelenos admit it. Also, Southern California has stupid slang.

Northern California has the redwoods, dirty hippies, fog, and disgustingly huge mansions. We are vastly superior to Southern California in pretty much any way that you care to name, and I don’t just say that because I live here. It’s just better. We have a higher concentration of top flight universities, for example. Like, oh, Berkeley, Stanford, and UCSF. We also aren’t completely socially backwards, like Southern California. Our only real shortcoming when compared to Southern California is that we have more hipsters than they do, but we’re working on a hipster relocation program which will hopefully export them all down south.

Now, another interesting thing about California is that it’s actually a conservative state. I know, I know, you always read about crazy liberals in California, but we’re not actually a liberal state. We have several concentrated pockets of liberals, with just enough of a population to swing towards liberal causes. Obviously, I live in one of those pockets, but if you check out a map of California with election results overlaid, this state is a sea of red, people. And if you actually paid attention to California election results, you would notice that, as a whole, the state leans towards the conservative; after all, we were the first state to formally define marriage as being between a man and a woman, much to my shame. This is because the batshit crazy right wingers are better at organizing than the hippies, and they know how to get out the vote.

Those people who hate America in San Diego? Yeah, that’s actually one of the wealthiest hardline Republican neighborhoods in California. Central and Eastern California are in fact filled with rabid Republicans. It’s true. Sometimes we fling patchouli and dismembered deer at each other over the Central Valley, which is why our wine is so fantastic.

California culture is complex, and it’s weird, and it’s basically unfathomable to people who don’t live here. There’s no single “California lifestyle” to aspire to, there’s no such thing as “California cuisine,” and please, stop calling San Francisco San Fran, Frisco, or SF. It’s San Francisco or the City.

I imagine that many people who live in idealized places struggle with the images that people have of their homes, and it probably annoys them as much as it annoys me. Sometimes, of course, it’s just entertaining to see how misinformed people are.

It’s very rare to see California cooperating as a state, unless we’re doing something completely insane like recalling the governor. The rivalry between NorCal and SoCal runs too strong in us, as do our fundamental political, racial, class, and religious differences. It’s not that surprising, really, when you think about the fact that California is larger than some countries, and we’ve had a tempestuous history which even includes a brief period as our own republic.

Definitely time for a two state solution.

Overheated Stingrays | 24Oct07

Maps of War is a neat site which uses maps as graphical representations for various power struggles. The map of religion is probably their most well known project, but there are some other excellent maps in there, like one of CIA prisons.

Houston Press looks at the Presidential candidates in a new light. Although funny, their decision to look at the candidates in terms of which cars they are is also an apt political criticism.

The Muslim Student Union at UC Irvine is growing quite a reputation, so one reporter decided to go check it out.

Maryland’s only mortuary science program is the topic of this interesting article. There are also some neat accompanying photographs, although no dead people if you’re secretly hoping for that.

Medical personnel in Gaza are unable to meet the basic needs of their staff, because they are too busy being caught up in political fighting.

Senior military commanders are speaking out against an invasion of Iran. Will Bush listen?

So anyway… is a great site by Eden, who is witty, good at writing, and delightfully random.

Fast Food | 23Oct07

An article in the Times dissecting the latest food recall makes some interesting points about the source of our food and the safety of the American food supply. It also got me thinking about a larger issue in American society: our obsession with instant gratification. I think that recalls like this are only going to grow more common as consumers put increasing pressure on the market for more, more, more, and companies respond by cutting corners. At the same time, we’re essentially culturing virulent bacteria which are going to make these food-related illnesses even more difficult to treat.

So let’s take a look at what the Times says. According to the article, the meat packer in question wasn’t properly inspecting its meat, and the company was certainly not checking for bacterial contamination nearly as often as they should have been. In fact, the company was testing three times a year for bacteria. That statistic is pretty mindblowing, if you ask me. I get tested more often than that, people, and you aren’t grinding me up and selling me in styrofoam and plastic packages.

The company wasn’t slacking because they didn’t care about their customers, though. Rather, they got in over their heads, rushing to meat the demand for meat during the summer months when everyone and their sister is firing up the barbecue. While one can’t just blame consumers for what happened, consumers need to get more educated about where their food comes from, and about food availability.

And the fact that food scarcity may start to become a major issue for us. And, if it isn’t, it should be.

I was talking about this with someone the other night, when we were talking about winter foods, and I was bemoaning the lack of greens and variation in produce. The person I was talking to pointed out that Harvest “has all that stuff,” and I had to gently suggest that since it’s not in season, it’s not a very healthy/good choice. Not because I care about the environment, and I don’t want my food being shipped for thousands of miles before it reaches me. Because I care about food, and making unseasonable produce available is a bad idea, since it teaches people that they can have whatever they want, whenever they want it. Also, produce out of season tastes like shit. And so does most produce in season, these days, since farmers pick it before its ripe to meet the demands of the market. The farmers’ market ends in a week, and good produce is going to be thin on the ground until it starts again.

Out of season food is getting out of control. Raspberries in November? No problem. Meat patties until the end of time? Also no problem.

But there is a problem, obviously, because our food producers are making us sick in their hurry to cater to us. If people stepped back and thought about seasonal availability, maybe they would be more into buying locally. If they bought locally, maybe they would understand what goes into the slaughter and butchering of an animal, and they wouldn’t demand meat patties constantly. If they understood where their food came from and how it reached them, maybe there would be a bigger push for better food safety regulations, just like after the publication of The Jungle.

This culture is all about customer satisfaction. Maybe it shouldn’t be. Maybe there should be some customer dissatisfaction. Perhaps the grocery store shouldn’t have lettuce in December. Possibly frozen meat patties shouldn’t always be available. Maybe it would lead us to respect our food more, and maybe it would protect us from getting sick and dying because greedy corporations want to cater to our misconceptions about food.

There’s been a lot of talk lately about “buy local.” Why don’t we get consumers started with buying seasonal?

Winsome Cowboys | 23Oct07

A transgender student tries to join the cheerleading team, and all hell breaks lose. Once the ACLU gets involved, you know things are going to get ugly.

Breast cancer awareness makes a lot of money. As this author points out, most of us are aware of breast cancer…and shopping does not, in fact, help us find cures for diseases.

The baby industrial complex gets a lot of money out of parents. A couple of crusaders think that it shouldn’t, and they work to educate consumers.

SFPD is cracking down on drugs in the Tenderloin, a process which apparently requires comparing drug sales to a farmers’ market.

Britain is abandoning its renewable energy targets. Maybe saving the earth won’t be as easy as we thought it would be.

Shapely Prose is an awesome site about fat issues. Go check it out.

A Daily Dose of Zen Sarcasm is remarkably funny, and it has a wide range of random posts about anything and everything under the sun.

Complain, Complain, Complain | 22Oct07

Haddock recently pointed out a major problem with online reviews in Owning Up, a post about an unfriendly review of his restaurant on a popular foodie site. One of his frustrations with the review is that while the reviewer points out flaws with his experience, Haddock says that he never contacted anyone at the restaurant about these problems. As a commenter points out, this is a classic example of “don’t do something, just complain!” Haddock’s post is more about centralized review sites, although some of the issues with online reviews apply to bloggers as well, I think.

I always find it entertaining when I read online reviews in which people claim to have hated their food, and yet they ate it anyway. Hello, people. If you don’t like your food, make your opinion known to the server when he or she stops by to ask how you’re doing. Servers don’t ask this out of random curiosity, they ask so that you can say “yes, everything is wonderful,” or “no, actually, everything is not all right, this is not what I expected/ordered/wanted/whatever.” If you don’t like your service, tell the floor manager or the owner, don’t just sit there like a lump stewing about it. There is no excuse to have a bad experience at a restaurant, unless you are too lazy to speak up.

There are a couple of problems with online reviews, and I don’t think that these problems will ever be addressed; there’s no real way to address these problems, and I think that they are flaws which should be recognized by people who utilize the internet for reviews. I often use various review sites, and I try to keep the inherent problems of free-for-all reviews in mind when I use them.

The first problem is that most professional reviewers eat at an establishment multiple times, allowing themselves to get a wide spectrum of service, cooking styles, and so forth. Professional reviewers also do not accept gifts, which is a fundamental problem with a lot of foodie blogs/sites, in my opinion. Responsible reviewers disclose presents, but others don’t, making it hard to judge whether or not a review is being honest and accurate. There is a huge barrier between a professional and casual reviewer, and people need to understand that. I, for example, post reviews of restaurants and services I like on this site, with the understanding that people know this is my opinion, not necessarily fact, because I am not accountable in the way that people like Michael Bauer are.

The second is the anonymity issue. It’s quite easy to write anything about anyone on the Internet, and it’s hard to verify such statements. I could ardently tell you not to eat at the MacCallum House, for example, and people searching for that establishment might decide not to on the basis of this statement, which would be hard to evaluate since my qualifications are not known, and this site is obviously a personal site, not accountable to the same standards that a newspaper is. (Do eat at the MacCallum house, by the way. I am a big fan of their bar menu, especially on rainy nights.) Anonymity makes it impossible to figure out if someone knows what he or she is talking about, and it’s impossible to get a handle on someone’s credentials when they post under a false name.

Many of these sites provide poor ways for people to communicate or to clear issues up. Someone can post under a pseudonym, for example, and a business owner may have a hard time tracking the author down to find out what happened, when, and what can be done to redress the situation. As a general rule, posts from restaurant owners on foodie sites are frowned upon, and I understand the desire to minimize “he said she said” arguments, but it would be helpful if whiny posters would respond to attempts to contact them; I think that if you want to say something nasty about something, you need to be prepared to face it.

Something that also troubles me is that there’s no way to rate reviewers on many of these sites. For example, if I find a reviewer who generally agrees with me on basic topics, I would like to be able to give that reviewer a higher score. If I think that a reviewer is not being strictly honest, or that his or her opinion is radically different than mine, I would like to be able to give that person a lower score. These scores could be added up to create a system of authority which could also perhaps be used to weight reviews. When a whiner repeatedly posts biased reviews, those could sink to the bottom of the pile, allowing the honest ones to float to the top.

Haddock also makes an excellent point about complaints; most owners want to address their complaints. This may not always be the case, but it is almost always true, because business owners know how bad a poor reputation is. At one point, I complained about terrible treatment at a local establishment to the owner and I received no satisfaction until I went public about it, but I went public after trying to resolve the issue privately, which is crucial. Alas, I didn’t receive satisfaction then, either, but this was an isolated case, not the rule! Furthermore, I don’t slam said establishment on foodie sites, although it is tempting, because it is possible that my experience was isolated, although when asked about it in a face to face conversation, I will make my opinion clear. Furthermore, every other time that I’ve had a bad experience, anywhere, and complained about it, I have been satisfied with the response, illustrating the value of communicating about my problems, rather than just whining about them to people who can’t do anything about it.

If you have a problem with the service somewhere, you should talk to the owner about it. He or she may not be aware of the problem, and in any case, the owners/managers of an establishment want to make sure that customers are happy so that they tell other people about their good experiences. Don’t hide behind the internet if you don’t like something. Obviously, if something annoys you enough to complain, it probably annoys other people; by complaining, you can make everyone else’s life so much more enjoyable. Think of it as public service.

One local restaurant here has a tagline on their receipts that says something along the lines of “If you liked your experience, tell your friends; if you didn’t, tell us!” I think this sums up that attitude of most business owners quite nicely. No business owner is going to dismiss a complaint carelessly, and if something upsets you enough that you want to write about it, you should probably get the matter cleared up. If you can’t get the issue solved, by all means, shout about it from the rooftops of the intertubes, but do so under your own name.

Haddock’s post also illustrates an important practice for business owners: look your business up on the internet to see what people are saying about it. Since you can’t stop people from saying idiotic things, you need to be aggressive about finding these idiotic things and addressing them. Many of these people just want to feel special, and if you contact them about their reviews, they often feel better about themselves and edit/remove their business-bashing. By being on top of these things, business owners can keep their reputations positive.

Doubtful Sneakers | 22Oct07

Obama’s doing the nation with a prominent “ex-gay” preacher. Please contact Obama’s campaign and say that you don’t support this; he may be the wunderkid of the Democratic Party, but we don’t need to tolerate homophobic bullshit as part of his campaign. Obama just lost my vote.

Foveant is a site with a ton of awesome photography, which happens to be run by a fellow Fort Bragg (or thereabouts) citizen. If you’re curious to know what it looks like where I live, check Foveant out.

Some bloggers actually make money, what an odd concept.

The corruption of the Iraq War has led to some undoubtedly unintended consequences.

I really like Wolky shoes. So much that I actually bought a pair yesterday. Go check them out, they’re comfortable, stylish, generally awesome shoes.

The things you can do with polymer clay are pretty darn amazing.

The British Scrabble Championship was just held, and this article is worth reading for the awesome words alone.

Fiction Scribe is a site by one of my fellow NaBloPoMoers. Great writing about fiction, books, and other aspects of literary culture.