Automatic Autocratic

I’m getting ready to head over to Mendocino and watch the parade, but first I had to check my RSS feeds. I have to say, I was astounded by the amount of bitterness and vitriol I found, on this oh so excellent national holiday. This, my friends, is America, where any male white child can dream of becoming President. And bald eagles soar over pristine national wilderness while children of all colors get equal access to education and other social benefits. Where convicted criminals can have their sentences commuted by their friends in office, and unicorns frolic in the fair streets of our Capitol.

And that, my friends, is pretty awesome.

This is the one day in which we get to join the military in celebrating our greatness by blowing things up. So, my American readers, it is your patriotic duty to go somewhere, meet interesting people, and blow them up. I mean set off some fireworks in a location of your choice. If you can possibly bring yourself to do it, please refrain from operating fireworks or a motor vehicle while intoxicated, although I know it’s difficult to resist the allure of delicious delicious beer on a day as excellent as this one.

I suppose my foreign readers are allowed to blow stuff up too, if they want.

I’m going to leave you with this superb video, which I recommend that you all watch to get in the mood. I’ll post some parade reporting later, and enjoy your 4 July.