Murdering Trees for a Good Cause

Well hi there all you visitors from Canada, France, Germany, Italy, and Japan. I hope you’re entertained.

So I was driving home from work today and as I went down the Caspar grade, I remembered freshman year, when we hauled that fallen tree out of the ditch, strapped it to Jim’s truck, and turned it into a school Christmas Tree. And this, in turn, reminded me of an imminent crisis: it is Smith tradition to have the tree up before December first. Which means, kids, that tomorrow is the day. As those aquainted with me know, I have a knack for picking the Charlie Brown Christmas tree–it always looks fine on the lot, and then when I get it home no matter how I trim it it ends up crooked. I am determined that this year, my tree shall be perfect! Beautifully symmetrical, elegantly formed, a sleek pillar of fir reaching for the ceiling. No longer will I have a tree which lists pathetically to one side or must be strapped to the furniture to keep it from tipping over! This is the year! The tree will be perfect! Especially since I’ve done most of my shopping already, I need to get a tree to stick my presents under, stat.

I’m thinking plain multicoloured lights this year. As anyone with cats know, any sort of ornamentation beyond that is playing with fire. However, given Loki’s obsession with anything that lights up, we still may be in trouble.

[Christmas Trees]